You'd look better when I'm drunk.
Tuesday, November 2, 2010, 5:31 PM
Yeah, I wanted to blog yesterday. Guess when I got home, I completely forgot 'bout it. Well, here I am now, and maybe I'd have something to write about.
So, I'm leaving the country for a couple of days, and I'd only be back next monday. And in the meantime I'm away, don't miss me too much yeah? (Lol. That was a joke.) I'll just to update, if there's time. But if I don't, then I uh, might write 'bout it when I get back. Maybe not though. Anyway. Yeah, that is all for the whole trip thing.
Went for choir today. And, I'd have to say, it was pretty okay, I guess. Though it was pretty um, awkward at first. And it got real cold after three o'clock. (NOW PLAYING: Some JapaneseRadioStation though iTunes. Hehe.) Some of the songs quite nice y'know. :) Though mostly... I don't really like them. But hey, at lease I'm listening to something different right. Hahah. Nowadays I turn on my iPod, I get bored of the music in it. LOL. Maybe it's because I'm watching a lot of shows.
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Anyway, I'm actually hoping that I don't sleep tonight. So for that to work, I'd have to sleep right now. But I'll complete my post before heading to zzz. I'm going to skip the part about choir. I only know that I've realised that there's a friend that means a lot to me in choir.
Hey C. Yeah, this is for you. I saw your blog post that was written on Saturday. By what I'm hearing, I think what you're going through is very much like what I've gone through about two years ago. I don't know if you remembered, but in 2007, you once asked me a question. A question that I didn't know how to answer you. Up until now, I don't even know how to answer it as well. But, I'd have to say, I've got a new answer to that question. But if you don't remember that question, I'd help you. You asked me why I was so mature. And if I didn't remember wrongly, I replied an 'I don't know' answer to you.
But my answer right now would be, I don't know, but it's not really nice to be mature when others are still young at heart.
I'd say, you were young at heart at that age. And you're probably growing up right now, I mean in the mind. But y'know what, your problem isn't really big okay. Because people do have doubts in themselves. I still do.
You're probably feeling confused right now. But hey, currently, I'm feeling real confused too. Because I've put down everything in the past, desperately trying to grasp the future but there's something tugging at my heart and it makes me feel like I'm doing the wrong thing. But I know that it is the right thing to do.
Well, what I did might be really difficult to you, and it will cost you a lot of struggle, but the afterparty after you've accomplished it will rock big time. You can choose not to use it, since I'm not exactly even asking you to do the same thing as what I did. But well, I'd advice you, the only way out is just be yourself. Let go of all your doubts, and be yourself. It's never a crime to be yourself. And you don't have to be self-conscious. Because you'll know that when people hate what they're doing, it just means that you're not worth their friendship, etc.
Being yourself is a very difficult thing to do, and even I'm struggling with it. But I hope that you'll just think through this and feel happier.
Ps. There's always a time that you have to let go and never look back.